Internet line is a bit slow this afternoon. It's a dial up, it's already good that it didn't dc frequently as it did it the past. Wanna write about something but didn't know what to write here :(

I never thought my old website still exist. Reading the entries make me remembered those old times ( well not so long ago, more like 2 years before ). Guess I missed those time when I had a job , datelines & that sort of thing. Now I had lived a domestic life, I felt so far left behind. *sigh* Guess I have to accept the fact that I'm never gonna have to work anymore. Saw one job ad yesterday for a general clerk for a computer shop. I know En lanun was a bit reluctant to let me try answered the ad.. Maybe he already feel comfortable with the condition right now- me staying at home managing everything. If I work maybe it will be a bit different. *sigh*

Today balqis turn six months old. Yesterday we went out because her daddy wanted to buy her a present- a walker :) saw a very nice one at Anakku store. As soon as we put her into the walker she staright away going backward which was perfectly normal for babies in learning process to walk. At first she seems to be liking it because she plays with the toys on the board and enjoyed the musics but after a while she raise up her hand to me, as if asking me to pick her up. maybe she feels awkward because with the walker she can 'moves' wherever she wanted to go but she preferred to be hold by me. Guess it all will take a while before she can get used to the walker, trained her legs & make it stronger before she could go walk by herself.

En lanun isn't home right now, he's the OOD (officer on duty) today & suppose to be home at 11.30 pm but he has one sortie tonight- at 12.00 am so he'll come home at about 4.00 am. Sounds like a hectic schedule but the good news is, he'll be off work tomorrow. Balqis is sleeping right now so I thought I'd surf the net for some recipe to make lasagna :) suddenly I had craved for the dish but I couldn't find it here. Secret Recipe just open their new outlet at Sitiawan but I doubt it that they have it. We ( En Lanun & I ) usually had lasagna at Delifrance Mahkota Parade or Jaya Jusco Ayer Keroh. Now that we seldom get back there, I might as well learn how to cook it myself :)

Alhamdulillah...it's the 3rd day fasting and surprisingly, I feel like ok, not like what I thought I'd be- feeling hungry or exhausted and laying all day. Berkat makan kurma agaknya. En Lanun never wake up for bersahur so I just woke him 5 minitutes before azan & forced him to eat at least one kurma & a glass of water. The wether also very good- sometimes it's raining, cold & windy. Hopefully this will continue until the end of Ramadhan ( though I doubt it- usually in the last week it's always hot ).
En Lanun was hoping to get the 2nd leave for Hari Raya- which means we'll celebrate 1st day of Hari Raya here in Manjung and on the 2nd day we can go back to kampung for the next 7 days. If we got the 1st leave, we only have 1 1/2 days to celebrate Hari Raya, and it's simply not enough because we both are from Melaka, and we combine our relatives, two days are simply not enough. But it looks like we are getting the 1st leave so guess we'll have to wait & see.
Actually 3-4 days ago our car was being jacked by someone. Nothing was taken except coins. At 12.00 am Balqis woke up & cried because she had gases in her stomach so I took her for a walk ( inside the house laa ) and then when I looked out of the window, I realized that the lamp in the car was lighted up. I was feeling uneasy so I out Balqis back in her craddle and went outside to investigate. Sure enough, both doors were not closed as it supposed to be, that's why the lamp was lighted. And the box inside the dashboard was opened, all the things inside spilled onto the passenger sit. I closed back the door and make sure I clicked the alarm on, go straight back into the house. Thank Allah nothing much worth to steal from it, and thank Allah that stupid guy doesn't know how to start the car or took the car radio.

It's Friday again. Lanun was supposed to fly to Subang today, spend one night there and fly back here on Saturday but there's one ceremony today so they decided to do the sortie tomorrow. This Sunday all muslims will be celebrating Ramadhan, a month full of berkat and it's a month I've been waiting for- to lose some weight *giggles*. You see, I'm breastfeeding so I eat all the time. Although I'm not quite sure if I can manage to fast the whole month, I'll try to make the most of it. I'll wear the bengkung that I used to wear after I gave birth because it hold my stomach so tight, I won't be hungry too much.
Ever since I started to be pregnant and gave birth, many things have changed. The most prominent changes is, my body *sigh* gosh, I never thought my hips can be this large. I knew they'll grow bigger in order to make way for my baby but though easy to expand, it's not that easy to shrink back to it's normal size. All of my jeans are now a history- good news for my sister because now she can wear them without asking my permission first. Also long gone are my red & grey punjabi suit, 3-4 blouses, all my favourites are not mine now- coz I couldn't fit any of themnow. Now I just wear baju kurung or kurung kedah. But it's not really a bad news coz now I got a new wardrobe with pants, slacks, jeans and blouses that my dearest hubby bought for me after seeing me struggled and staring so long in the closet thinking about which one should I wear when he asked me out for shopping or sight seeing because, well, basically there're not many to choose from. But I swear I'm going to fight back for what are mine- my favourite Edwin white jeans and that red punjabi suit that my sister wore so proudly infront of me. Siaplah...
Other things that changed is, my priority. Which is, no doubt about it- my baby girl balqis. Even before she's born, there're no longer 'me', it's always 'she,she,she'. I think I haven't had enough sleep for over a year now. During my pregnancy, my sleep is disturbed by that frequent visit to the bathroom ( that's why she's born with thick hair), backache and the difficulty to breath ( sometimes ). Doctor said it's normal. Yeah sure I knew it's normal but what I want to hear is how am I going to go through the period without so much pain. And then she was born. The first two weeks is quite ok but after that, sleeping at night is almost impossible. She cried a lot, maybe because then she realized she's not in my womb anymore, not feeling the safety & comfortness she's so used to. And now, although she only awake when she's hungry about 2-3 times, sometimes she just don't fall back into sleep and smiling with her eyes so wide and shiny, I just couldn't stand to be mad at her coz she's so cute! So I'll try my best to play with her & sometimes fall back to sleep while she plays by herself. Quite dangerous at this time because she's moving backward now, so she could be rolling off her mattress to the floor ( happened before ). Once she learned how to walk, I better make my eyes open or I might regret if something bad happen to her.
And between taking care of my baby and managing this 2 storey house, I don't even have time for myself. I've read all about post-natal depression so I tried so hard not to be that and learns how to manage everything slowly & wisely. The first few weeks without my mother helping me, it's quite depressing and difficult for me. I longed to have a 15 minutes ( at least ) in the shower without being disturbed by her crying suddenly. Now I could have a decent shower time because I learned her way- when she should wake up, when to feed her, when's her sleeping time, therefore I could manage my own time to do my things. I just hope I stay healthy to take care of her and loved her as much as I can, coz I cpuldn't imagine my life without her.
Happy Ramadhan to all of us.

Am writing this entry with Balqis on my lap, trying to reach the mouse and hitting the keyboard and putting the wire into her mouth. Been trying to make her sleep but she just refuse to- keep mumbling something and playing with her lips like saying " I wanna play lah mak ". Ok...but stop hitting the keyboard, ok baby? :)

Yesterday at about 2 pm a Chinese man stood infront of my house ( outside the gate ) and greeted me like this - " Selamat ptg abang kakak... maaf ganggu sebentar.." and keep repeating this about 10 times. I was inside with Balqis, peeping from the windows. After not getting any responsed, he did something I didn't expect- he opened my gate and stepped infront of my door. Gosh. Maybe he knew someone was inside because the windows are opened. And then this is the time Balqis started to cry because her toy fell and she couldn't reach for it. And somehow he saw me behind my day-curtains. Great. I had a very, very bad experience with people like this so I was kinda phobia when he introduced himself and started asking me questions like what brand I used to wash clothes, etc etc. After that he gave me a small angpow and asked to opened it. I knew what I should expect inside so I just opened it quickly and get a big "THANK YOU" inside. After that I quickly dismissed him. When my hubby came back from work later that evening, I told him about it and decided maybe we should chained our gate. It's the only thing we can do to avoid this tihng from happen again. So today after he went to work I chained the gate. Felt a bit uneasy, like I was trapped and prisoned in my own house. But then again it's crucial for the safetiness of our family.
Oh. Balqis just vomited to my shirt. Let me changed first and I'll continue writing this entry. Have a nice day, btw.


Yesterday lanun had to work- he had one sortie so he went for work at 9.30 am and came back two hours later. When he entered the house and looked at me, he noticed something in my right eye. When he looked a little closer he said there're blood in my white eyes. Gosh, I was so afraid because even though I didn't feel anything strange, but when I looked at it in the mirror, it looked pretty bad. Seems like my upper eyes ( the one covered by my upper lid ) was stucked out a little, therefore it's bleeding and the blood didn't come out, it was spreading in my eyes. Thank Allah it wasn't my kornea, otherwise I might lose my eyesight. En lanun took me straight to the clinic, and the doctor said it's nothing serious, she'll give me eyesdrop to drain the blood and antibiotic.
Until today nothing much change with my eye. I hope it'll get better soon. The sight of it is pretty scary. Had the picture of it and I'll try to upload it here. See..?

Am soooo addicted to the Internet! Before you say anything let me tell you why I said that. Before this I had unlimited resources to the internet from where I worked. When I quite my job I moved to Sitiawan and we didn't have a phone line, therefore my surfing activities is limited to weekends. That's when I'm pregnant. After that a few months I delivered my baby, I don't have much opportunity to surf the net unless Mr lanun came home and bring the laptop (mom didn't allow me to sit on the chair too long to use my desktop ). After that we moved again to our new house at Manjung and we thought maybe we don't need to install a phone line since we both have our handphone. WRONG!! Because this time I only get the chance to surf & checked my email once a month! That's when we go balik kampung and use the phone line there. How pathetic. And sometimes I don't even have time to surf with Balqis and everything.
That's why I almost jumped when one Friday ( 2 weeks ago ) Mr lanun came back from his office and said get ready, let's go to TMPoint and apply for a line. Am sooo happy!!! :) The process is pretty easy and she said it'll be installed within 24 hours. Yeah right. We had to wait for 36 hours until Monday for the contractor to come. But with a reasonable reason, it's ok.
So now I had to change my daily schedule. Yup, with babies in the house, you need to follow a routine so that you can do everything accordingly or else, you won't even have time to bath or eat. Trust me, I'm living it.
It's finally Friday. En lanun's sister is helding a feast this Sunday at her house in Putrajaya, unfotch we couldn't come because he's on duty this weekend. Sorry sis, hope everything's going according to plan.

Yesterday a friend of mine told me that I could get some money if I put Adsense on my blog. So I did it- it's pretty easy ( as you can see before my entries there is a banner with link to other webpages ). Unfotch today I got an email from Adsense saying they are unable to accept my aplication because I used unsupported language in my website. Of course it's their fault- they forgot to put in 'Bahasa Rojak' in the list =p well, what to do, I want to write in English but sometimes it sounds better in Malay, vice versa. So maybe when I had more time I'll rewrite my entries in English and submit my aplication once again.
Guess I had better remove the ads. Quite irritating, isn't it?

There's a blackout at 5.45 pm today. I was a bit afraid since we have one aquarium in the house, so if the electricity doesn't recover soon maybe it's too late to save all my fishes- 2 Lampans, 2 karp and 2 gold sepat. After one hour, one of the lampans doesn't look so good- it's not swimming and its body had turned upside down. I kept ready a bil pail with water and anti clorin, just in case. But thank Allah after a while the electricity is back and the fish are like, so relieved ( so am I! ) and swimming like they haven't swim all day :)
Now we can watch Monster Inc. tonight :)

Thank Allah, this morning Telekom's contractor came and installed the phone line. Actually we had registered last friday and the clerk said it'll be installed within 24 hours. It's already 3.30 pm by that time, so we understand if they couldn't make it that day. We expected they will come on Saturday, but they didn't. Sunday, off day, of course. So finally they came this morning.. he said they were supposed to come on Saturday but it was raining heavily, not safe to do wiring. I just nodded in agreement as long as he finished installed the phone line ASAP. But after he finished I couldn't use it straight away- I have to wait for a call from Telekom operator to confirm everything is ok. And then I have wait another one hour before I could make any call. Oh, waiting is so painful! But so worth it :)
So now that the line is ok,I just couldn't any seconds to use it! What else, surf the Net la... Hak hak... we won't be using this line for calling but only for surfing the internet. Since we couldn't go to the cc anymore with Balqis, she's sooo naughty & took anything infront of her & stuffed it into her mouth. Half of my Astroguide cover was torn by her, chewing it like bubble gum :)
Looking at her now, I think she's the most amazing thing ever happen to me. Her development is quite fast now, it's like she has grown a lot when ever I set my eyes off her. She just learnt to move her body, but instead of going forth, she's actually going back! It's really annoyed her especially when her toys fell infront of her and she tried to reached it back but couldn't so she screamed loudly so that I will come and helped her. After that she plays happily like nothing happen. It's so fascinating seeing her like that... The only problem we face now is, she's not too friendly with strangers, and everybody is stranger except for me & En lanun. 24 jam ngadap muka mak dia so bila ada org lain dia x nak, nangis2 gitu. Abah dia pun dia x berapa nak, kalau time memasak tu mesti nak dokong dia dok kat pintu dapur tu. Apa org kata, kalau x dapat sentuh tgk muka mak dia pun jadi le =P
Semalam adik sepupu aku konvo UUM. Dia konvo sesi ptg, so aku ajaklah dia tido sini sbb nak balik melaka malam2 tu mmg penatlah, tambah2 sekarang ni musim hujan. Mula- mula dia kata x jadi tapi dah last2 tu dtg jgk. Pkl 2.30 pg dia sampai kat Sitiawan, en Lanun datang gi amik diaorg satu kereta. Seronok je dgr dia cerita kisah dia konvo. Teringat 4 thn lepas ( iskk.. was it that long ago? ) masa aku konvo. Dahlah aku extend setahun ( which means, all my friends has already graduated a year before ), only one of them could make it to my graduation ( thnx Yus & Ayie ), en Lanun plak tgh belayar masa tu ( but still remembered to send a congratulation card, thnx hon! ) and to make it worse mak sakit masa tu.. kena demam denggi. Apa nak buat, nasib baik adik aku ikut sama boleh lah tolong2 amikkan gambar.

Semalam mak minta tolong antarkan dia ke mesyuarat PIBG adik aku kat Bukit Rambai so pagi2 ni kami bersiap2lah. sekali bila dah sampai sana pelik juga sebab sunyi sepi je. rupa-rupanya diaorg kata dah postpone ke hari Selasa... Aduhh siannye mak aku. Adik aku pun sengal dah tau bukan nak bagitau kat mak, dia dok sms abah kat JB nun. Lps bagi barang2 kami pun baliklah. Singgah Tesco sekejap beli baju Balqis. Baju2 dia hampir2 x muat dah =P atuk dia kata baju tu dah kecik...he he... bukan Balqis yang dah besar ke atuk? :)

Ptg, semua dok terbaring dah. Aku tengok cerita Click sorang2. Isk.. sedih jugak masa part yang dia sakit & lari keluar panggil nama anak dia. I mean, knowing Adam Sandler- he's a totally funny man with his slow way of talking. Tapi mmg best lah cerita tu.
Which comes to my next story- got an email from my good friend saying how she wanna quit the job she got now to concentrate more to her family- her husband & her 1-year old++ daughter. Funny, I wanted a job so badly and she wanted the opposite thing. Just one thing to say, be careful with what we wish for..